Hello, my name is Jose Phillanzo and I own the Gas 'N' Go Stop convenience store right here in Gotham. We have the best nachos in town, so stop by the Stop and try them for yourself! But, I am not here to advertize. I want to ask you for some protection. You see, many teenagers shoplift at my store and I do not know what I to do. What can you say for me?

I know the Gas 'N' Go Stop. Me and my girl used to make out in your parking lot.

That is romantic.

I'd love to help. Hey, guys, why don't we patrol the perimeter to prevent a 10-20?

Actually, CzarLee, a 10-20 is a robbery that's already happened. I think you meant to say "10-30" (that's a robbery in progress)

Hey! It's the Dougster! How ya been, Bri?

Can't complain. I just want to make sure that everything's on the up-and-up with this stakeout.

My boot will be up-and-up their keisters if they try to rob Josie's store.

My name's Jose.

Whatever. I just can't wait to crack some shoplifting skulls.

You've been warned before, BigEd. We can't have that kind of talk on these boards.

You're right - too much talk, not enough rock.

I hope that's not a metaphor for violence.

No, BigEd dooesn't get metaphors.

I get that I'll metaphor your face if you don't shut it!

Guys, this isn't productive. And if the rat squad gets wind of this, they'll can me.

What's the rat squad, Big Bri?

Oh, sorry, I forget that not everyone works for the GPD like I do. The rat squad is what we call internal affairs.

I'm about to have an affair with some whoop-ass in Jo-Jo's pparking lot.

Still not my name.

Look, do you want me to regulate or not? I've got an itchy trigger finger and it needs flexing.

That's it, BigEd, you're not allowed on this site anymore.

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